Back to Chicago

Warning - this blog should not be read before meal time.

One of Ava's daycare teachers is 8 months pregnant and is expecting a baby girl. I thought this was a fantastic opportunity to hand off some of Ava's baby clothes. I know, I know, we might have a girl one day again; however, since we are lucky to have many friends and family that had little girls - we inherited loads and loads of baby clothes. I thought I could return the favor. As I sorted through Ava's baby clothes that she has grown out of - I noticed the many stained clothes. Hmnn...I don't recall Ava having this many accidents...yup, now I remember, she had blowouts almost twice a day for the first few months. After segregating a pile- stained versus non-stained, I came across an odd colored bib that had been deliberately stretched. Why did this bib have brown stains? She wasn't eating solids back then...then it struck me. A flashback of sitting in a plane (on a flight from Chicago back to Syracuse) with a half-naked baby in a Baby Bjorn with no diaper. Yes, this was the trip from hell that is worth bringing back to light in hopes that no one will make the many mistakes I did that weekend.

I had a sales training seminar in Chicago and Eric was unable to join me so I decided to venture this trip alone and I was able to line up a babysitter that sat for our close friends that lived in Chicago. We had brought Ava with us to Chicago a few months before for another one of my work conferences and she did well with the travel; however, I significantly underestimated the one major missing factor of this second trip... the help of another adult. The coldest weekend happened to be this weekend - even colder than Syracuse - 15-20 degrees below zero.

Everywhere I went with Ava after landing in O'Hare, people stopped to stare at me and shake their head in disbelief. I had Ava strapped in front of me in a Baby Bjorn (well bundled) and I dragged behind us the largest bag we owned which weighed over 50 lbs (I got the fine for being over), a diaper bag, a purse and a computer bag. And no I didn't have a cart either. I had to drag a few bags, stop and go back and drag a few more - in the sub-zero weather- in order to get to the car rental bus stop. Fortunately, I looked pathetic enough to have good Samaritans offer up help - if I had a million dollars I would have handed it all right over to them. A woman directing local traffic stopped to help me get on the Hertz bus. The Hertz rental car center had a long line of people waiting outside and by this time I wanted to breakdown and cry but since there were icicles already formed around my eyes and nose no tears could escape. Ava remarkably didn't say a peep - she just buried her face into my chest and fell asleep. Somehow with the sympathy of more kind strangers we were allowed to wait inside until our place in line finally made it's way to the front. Somehow we made it to the hotel late that evening without losing limbs to frost bite.

The next day was the first day of my sales training and of course my sitter was 30 minutes late. Not good considering our regional CEO was making the opening remarks and he made an example out of me for being late to the last conference in Chicago (that is another blog- Eric forgot all the breast-milk so I had to pump during the breaks). At least this time he was more forgiving because he heard through the grapevine I was traveling solo with infant. Fortunately the training flew by and very soon it was time to head back home.

In good spirits - assuming nothing could possibly be worse than the trip out, I foolishly packed our bags too quickly and headed out the airport. Bags checked in and off we went to our gate. It wasn't until I was in the airport restroom changing Ava before our flight, did I realize that I had only 1 diaper in the changing bag. This was after I already threw her wet diaper in the trash and with 5 minutes to spare before plane take-off. WTF!!! @#$%!!! What have I done and what do I do now? It was 5 p.m. and Ava had not gone #2 yet (and she usually has 2 blowouts by this time). With stress from the thought of being left behind and stuck here overnight I put the fresh diaper on Ava and quickly boarded our fully packed plane. The flight was direct and a little over 2 hours...I prayed for a miracle - that we would get through this. Well of course, not more than 10 minutes into the flight, while ascending, I hear a rumbling noise followed by an explosion of gaseous, wet sounds. I felt immediate warmth on my lap and on my stomach and down my legs...I was afraid to look down and after a few seconds didn't have to because the stench was quite overwhelming. Time to go the restroom! I bolted out my seat and slammed the door shut. YUCK- GROSS! - the stuff was all over the place...and Ava squirming around didn't help matters either as her movement distributed the stuff against the walls and the sink and floor of the ever so small restroom which in matter of seconds became even smaller and claustrophobic. Two more hours to go, I thought maybe I can hang out here in the bathroom until we land? That thought was interrupted by the flight attendant banging on the door to tell me that I needed to get back in my seat.

After a quick survey of materials in the bathroom, my only option was to create a makeshift diaper out of her bib and stuff a ton of toilet paper and paper towels (as much as the bib could hold). For redundancy, I put Ava back in the Baby Bjorn and place some paper towels under her bib within the Baby Bjorn. At this point I didn't care if anything leaked out and...boy did it (poop #2 happened a half an hour later). So we sat in our seat stinking up a storm - we were quite a spectacle. I tried to pretend I didn't see the disgusted looks all around me and the many people that reached up to turn on their air above their seat or wave their hand in front of their nose to diffuse the odor. After enduring the longest agonizing two hours of my life we made it back to Syracuse. When I got to baggage claim the crowd parted away for us like the Red Sea...one advantage to being filthy with a baby in tow. We made it out of there and I was never happier to be home. Note to self, no more plane travel without extra diapers!

As morbid it sounds, I couldn't toss out the stained bib- one day it will be a great but odd-ball conversation piece that I could embarrass Ava with when she becomes an unruly teenager one day.